Harper Jean

One of the things I love best about this sweet little girl is the way she looks at her momma...who is still my sweet little girl.

 

The secret to being Nana...

...okay, so maybe I don't really have a secret...because maybe there AREN'T any real secrets, to being a Nana, or to being a Mom (or a parent), for that matter.  Maybe the real secret is that we all just do the best we can...with our kids, and then, when we are particularly blessed, with our grand kids...and really, in life.  We all just do the best we can!  

Harper, my granddaughter, is growing fast, though she is still so tiny!  She explores her little world eagerly, paying so much attention now to expressions and faces and sounds and kitties!  She is almost ready to sit all by herself; she loves to stand up, with help; and still loves to be cuddled into her blanket too!  She laughs the cutest little belly laugh, especially when her momma is playing with her!  She is so fun to watch because everything is new to her...so watching her explore is a little like seeing the world for the first time, again!  I mean, I had totally forgotten how much fun it was to put my toes in my mouth!  Ahhh, she's so adorable and I love her so much!

A sweet friend of mine, a young mom, posted a picture on Facebook today of her son heading off to Kindergarten...and it doesn't seem that long ago when I took those same pictures; of new backpacks, clean shoes, fresh crayons...time really does fly by!  I was remembering a letter I had written to the girls' elementary school parents and faculty upon quitting my job there and moving here...  I wrote to them about some of lessons I had learned while working among incredible educators and alongside amazing parents...and honestly, I probably learned the most important lessons from the children themselves...lessons about being a kid, and about being an adult...lessons about the human experience.  The last line in the letter was this -

"I have learned that we all really want the same things for these children - for them to feel success and pride, belonging and security, for them to feel encouraged, nurtured and appreciated, and a sense of 'being a part of" something...and really, we all want the same things for ourselves..."  

The secret to being a Nana...well, I don't have any secrets, but I am ready with lots of love and kisses, and boxes of fresh crayons (when she's ready!)...and, I am just doing the best I can!

Oh, but here is a pretty new secret...I'm going to be a Nana again in February!!!  Congratulations to Allison & Stephen!!!  I am so excited for you!



Africa...a travel day...mostly.

Another journal entry from our trip to Africa!

We got a good night's sleep and watched the sunrise from our deck overlooking the Ngorongoro Crater, listening to lions roaring below.  We had a nice breakfast in the dining room and packed to get ready for our travel day...we were headed to the Serengeti!

Along the way, our first stop was a trinket shop, similar things as the shop before so we mostly just browsed and enjoyed a nice cold bottle of Coke and a chance to stretch our legs!  

A Maasai herder.

The next stop was at Olduvai Gorge, an important historical site, where Louis and Mary Leakey did much of their research and excavation to further the understanding of early human evolution.  It was kind of interesting, but as we drove away our friendship with Lyle and Sue solidified as Lyle quietly admitted, "we don't really DO museums."  Yep, us either!

Olduvai Gorge.

Oh, and we saw a herd of giraffes!

This is called "necking"!  Go figure!

Maasai momma.

Don't know if they were all hers, they were standing by the road...

The next stop was at a Maasai village.  I was kind of excited about it when I saw it on our itinerary (the photo-journalist in me) but as we drove across the hottest, driest, most barren part of the world you can imagine, my enthusiasm began to dwindle, a little!  We pulled in, near a circle of huts, and watched what can best be described as a trained human act...the Maasai villagers putting on a performance to entice us into their village (for a fee, of course)...and our collective enthusiasm kind of plummeted.  Once the rest of our group arrived, we had a brief discussion and ultimately decided we would all partake in the adventure, though Lyle and Mike swore they would get back in the car if they were asked to participate in the dance!

Part of their performance.

Chanting.

Dancing.

A standing jump!  This guy was pretty amazing!

The villagers were very gracious and eager to entertain, singing and chanting and then showing us their traditional jumping skills and inviting us to partake.  Gene and Henry jumped in and made a valiant effort, but the villagers had them beat on talent for sure!  We all broke up into small groups to get a tour of one of the huts in the village, and then to the kindergarten class to see the kids, then to the "gift shop" area to buy our souvenirs.   

Gene gave it a shot!

And Henry!

  

It was a brief, staged glimpse on how and where they have lived, but I had to wonder, with this new element of tourism, how their traditions and lifestyles will change from here on out.  The Maasai people have lived for centuries in the crater and survived as herders, primarily, but now there is this performance-based money-making element that surely will change the way they live. 

Sweet little guy.

The kindergarten classroom.

The children, of course, were beautiful and so sweet.  Much like in Thailand, at the first boarding school we went to, they were immediately instructed to sing, the alphabet (in English) and on the chalkboard were English words along with Swahili.  It wasn't as genuine as I would have liked, but it was a glimpse into their lives and I appreciated their enthusiasm.

Singing for us!

Making a neck band.

Beautiful, warm people.

And then, we were on our way, down the dustiest, rockiest, most deserted road ever, which seemed to last forever! The four of us got really good at synchronizing our windows closed when vehicles passed by and then opening them up again for a breeze! We reached the entrance to the Serengeti, marked by an arched sign and a group of Maasai women, begging, and Godfrey stopped to clean his windshield. We heard a hissing noise coming from the back tire...so, we got out, unloaded all of our gear and luggage to get to the jack, and changed yet another flat tire! It's no wonder, on the road we just traveled, the rocks were huge and the ruts were incredible! Four defective, borrowed, jacks and finally a creative method for lifting up the vehicle later, roasting in the hot sun, Godfrey worked away quietly and, an hour later when we all piled into the car to head down the road, he began again, undaunted, with his guide narrative!

We caught up with the rest of the gang at a picnic spot, the only trees for miles, ate our boxed lunches (Oh, a word on box lunches...is it safe to eat yogurt and cooked meat that has been sitting in the hot car for 5 hours?! Well, we did!), used potties, went on a walk, changed another tire, and we were off again!

The terrain changed as we went on, the grasses a little greener, and taller. We stopped a couple of times near some cool boulders, very Lion King-ish, called kopjes where Martin and Godfrey thought we might spot some lions.

Thunderclouds building.

Kopjes.

 And then, as the sun was dropping and we were headed towards Dunia Camp, Debra spotted a lion in the grasses...so we followed a jeep trail into a grassy area and, as the scene unfurled, watched 12 lions on the hunt! This time they weren't interested in using our vehicles for shade, but instead remained very focused on the Grant's gazelles and hartebeest we had just passed.

It was incredible! Really an awesome thing to watch! At one point, as they all came passing by our vehicle at a close enough range that we could've touched their tails as they went by our windows, we lost sight of one of the male lions who had rubbed along our vehicle and we all began to imagine what-if scenarios which included lions pouncing into our open vehicle! I think I swore under my breath a couple of times, maybe a couple of dozen times, especially when they would look right at you, with such intensity in their eyes!

We were probably with them for close to an hour, and watched them prowl, synchronized to the lead of the first female lioness who had her eye firmly on the prize, for 100 yards or more, getting closer to their prey. It was riveting!

Look closely, there are two of them.

Amazing!

This was one of the lead lioness'...watching the gazelle...when the gazelle put their heads down to eat, the lions moved forward.

...never taking their eyes of their prey.

...such intensity.

They were so healthy and beautiful!

I might have sworn in my head watching this one pass by our open vehicle!

A young male...the females did the hunting, the males hung back.

This one had a bad eye.

There are 11 of them in this picture!

But then, as usual for us, we were late getting to where we were supposed to be be!  The parks, though vast and seemingly impossible to regulate, do have rangers, and there are strict curfews for safari vehicles and their drivers.  So, we flew out of there and across the plains at record speeds to our tent camp destination!  (We got stuck in black mud for a bit, and poor Godfrey stepped out to see what his traction looked like and got attacked by biting ants, but we made it to Dunia!)

We were escorted to our beautiful tents (after signing a release form that basically said if we wandered around unescorted and got eaten by a lion, it wasn't their fault!) and enjoyed our first bucket showers (each tent had an attendant who hoisted a huge bucket of warm water into a receptacle above your bathroom!  So cool!) and then a yummy, incredibly elegant dinner in the dining tent.  Again, we loved the chance to talk as a group about the day's events!  The lion hunt was my favorite thus far...unless it be the elephant...or the rhinos...!

(P.S. We had a celebratory toast at dinner...happy 26th anniversary to my travel partner, my best friend, my husband, Mike.)

That night, as we were packing our camera gear for another adventurous day, my mind continued to wander, wishing for a relaxing day with no dusty roads, no broken down vehicles, no warm box lunch...and so, knowing I would be giving up one day of a Serengeti adventure, I decided to stay in Dunia Camp for the whole next day, to give a slower pace a try! 

Arms wide open.

I love him.  Okay, well why wouldn't I, right?!   He's very sweet, smart, funny, silly, curious, energetic, happy...oh, and just look at those baby blue eyes! 

But the thing is, he's already taken...  He's got a girl in his life who loves him even more than I possibly could.  And in this picture he is telling me (showing me) how much he loves her. 

"This much" he said, as he looked up at her.  Yep, that's a lot of love, Max. 

Well, he should love her that much...she is a pretty incredible lady...and Max, well, he calls her mommy.

A walk in the park.

One of the nicest compliments I can get upon finishing up a photo shoot is this one..."Oh, we're done?!  Okay, that was easy!  It felt like we just went on a walk together!" 

Taking a walk in the park is exactly what I got to do a little while ago, with these two...some of my very favorite two people!  And our little walk together resulted in some of my very favorite images. 

Of course, how can I go wrong...look at that sweet face!

A voice for them.

Mike & I just returned from a long, fun weekend in Fairbanks, Alaska!  Among other highlights, my favorite one...we got to see Allison & Stephen (yaaaay!)!  And we got to hang out with some really fun people; our hosts, the Wall family (including it's newest member, handsome little Triston!), the Barney's, the Sanders' (including sweet baby Emmett), the Martin's and all the workings of Friends Community Church!  What nice people, all of them!  I got to fly in a two-seater Cub over the Alaskan countryside at sunset with a great pilot, thanks Jeff!  We also drove a swamp-buggy!  And, we sat in on an impressively energetic UAF Economics lecture thanks to professor Sherri!

But, the primary purpose of our trip to Fairbanks was to help raise money and awareness to the Friends of Partners cause.  If you have followed my blog at all, you will know that I recently went to Thailand and Burma with Partners, an organization whose mission is "free, full lives for the children of Burma."  If you are interested, here is my talk from Friday night's yummy banquet.  (I was the brief "opening act" for the impressively well-spoken, motivational, and lovely Oddny Gumaer!)

_____________________________________________________

My name is Kris Ryan and I thought I would take a few minutes to explain to you how it is that I came to be here, in front of you, in Fairbanks, Alaska and how it is that I came to take those images you saw displayed so beautifully as you came through here today.

I am a photographer and I live in Pocatello, Idaho.  Several years ago, when both of my beautiful daughters were in high school, I went back to school, to Idaho State University, to study the very lucrative subject of Philosophy!  I took a class entitled the Anthropology of SE Asia from a professor who has been doing research in Burma over the last decade and a half and has close connections to the Burmese people.  It was an eye-opening, compelling class that made me aware of a country I was not aware of, a culture I had not ever studied before, and a decades long conflict I couldn’t possibly begin to understand.  I began searching out news on Burma, of which there is very little.  I read books about the Burmese people, of which there are very few. 

A few semesters later, my daughter, Ashley, was in college and I recommended the class to her…and she loved it as well.  We began to care about people we had no immediate knowledge of, save that they were oppressed, abused and that it was heartbreaking. 

And then one day my daughter, Allison, starting dating this guy, Stephen Wall.  I noticed on Stephen's Facebook page that he "liked" an organization called "Free Burma Rangers."  So one day he told me about Fairbanks' connection to the Burmese people and their struggle.  He told me about Partners, and Steve (his namesake) and Oddny Gumaer and their dedication to helping the people of Burma.   For my birthday, a few months later, Stephen sent me the most wonderful, thoughtful gift…a book that Oddny had written about the people she had been working with and meeting and helping.  (The book is entitled "Displaced Reflections" and can be purchased through Partners' website.)

I loved the book, both the imagery and the stories.  And now I had this pulling connection to get involved.  I contacted Maureen, the U.S. Director for Partners, interested in hearing more about the art program that Partners had been doing with refugee children.  I wasn't able to make the trip that Maureen was planning, but I became fully invested in becoming involved…and through a series of phone calls and Skype conversations, to Terry & Jocelyn, here in Fairbanks, to Jeff Wall, to my agreeable and gracious husband who rarely says no to any of my crazy ideas, and lastly to Steve Gumaer…my daughter Ashley and I found ourselves, just a couple of months later, exhausted from a long trip, standing in the Chiang Mai, Thailand airport, at midnight, meeting Oddny Gumaer. 

We didn't know for sure what we had gotten ourselves into, it just felt like we had to go, that we needed to be a witness ourselves to the lives of these people we had come to care about.  So we went on an adventure, and the images in the foyer reflect some of the people we met along the way. 

I'd like to share with you just a couple of stories from our trip, and I am hoping that you will be able to find yourself there with us…as one of the most profound moments, for each of us, on our trip, was when we found "ourselves"  there, in the hills of Burma, in a hide site or a refugee camp… 

For Ashley, it was meeting and talking with one of the Karen soldiers who was with us on our trip…  We were all sitting together in one of the huts one evening; two American women, a Norwegian woman, Karen women and their children, and a few Karen soldiers…and we were talking about our home in Idaho when Ashley realized she had, in her backpack, her iPod, with a few images stored on it and enough of a battery left to turn it on and share them.  One of the soldiers, who had been silent our whole trip, was really curious and he came and sat next to her as she swiped through them…a couple of her wedding pictures, pictures of her friends being silly, pictures of her family…and he sat, mesmerized, and smiling…  He asked her, in English, "those your friends?  that your husband?  that your sister?  this your mom?" and smiled, as we all do when we look at a new friends pictures, or discover a new friends Facebook album!  "That America?" he asked.  And that is when it really struck her…he could be my friend if he lived in the states.  He was just one year older than she…  He could be my neighbor, my co-worker, my brother…she thought.  But here he is instead…this handsome, courteous, sweet young man, living his life running from an enemy…and it is all he has ever known.

For me, similarly, while sitting in a very surreal setting, still trying to grasp that I was actually in Burma, sitting in a bamboo hut, we listened as two women recounted their lives to us…running, fleeing death, starving, trying to create a life for their families, trying to survive…  And, oddly, unexpectedly, I began to recognize "myself" in one of the women…  She was close to my age (okay, I am a few years older, but who's counting!)…she had children whom she obviously adored, as do I…she liked to sew, she made the beautiful and intricate top she was wearing, and she liked to make things for her family.  She laughed when she admitted, through a translator, that she had never been this close to a white woman!  I laughed in return and said well, I've never been this close to a Karen woman!  She looked to me like a movie star, the incredibly strong, beautiful heroine in a great epic adventure…and she had similar thoughts, saying she had only seen a white woman on a movie screen when she was little.  Her name is Naw Mu Wah, her picture is featured in the front of the foyer with her little girl…and though I saw myself in her that day, it was clear to me that she was so much stronger than I, so much braver than I could ever be…and she is in my thoughts every single day.

I asked one of our guides why these women had trekked alone through the jungle for so many days, at such great risk, just to come and talk with us…and she replied…"they just want to be heard"…they just want to know that someone cares about them…that "they haven't been forgotten."  So, I am grateful for the experiences of our trip to meet the Karen people of Burma…and grateful that I can be a voice for them, so that they can be heard, cared about, and not forgotten.

I thank Oddny, for sharing this amazing experience with my daughter, Ashley, and I.  I thank Stephen, my new son-in-law, who linked my heart with these amazing people I was fortunate enough to meet.  Thank you to the Wall family, my daughter Allison's new second family, for their hearts and their hospitality.  And I thank you all for your hearts tonight…thank you for coming to hear their stories.

Alas!

Image by Ashley!

Alas!  I have finally managed to update both of our websites, Mike & Kris Ryan Photo and Heart & Soul Images, with a gallery of images from our trip to visit Burmese refugees.  Any and all of the images are available as prints, traditional or canvas (they look especially nice on canvas), as well as press-printed greeting cards.  All proceeds from any print sales will go directly to Partners to help them continue their amazing work with the Burmese people.  Please let me know if you'd like to purchase, or donate!
We are headed up to Fairbanks, Alaska this week, to attend their annual fundraiser for Partners, where Oddny will be speaking!  It will be good to see her again, this time absent the frizzy hair and mosquito netting!  And, we are excited to get to see Allison & Stephen (our daughter and son-in-law) too, along with much of the Wall family!
Then, I will actually be home for a bit, catching up with clients, trying to beat the winter weather that is surely going to find us soon!  Looking forward to a BSU tailgater with the Ryan clan next month, a grand-baby ultrasound (yay!), another trip to the beach, and getting ready for the holidays?!  Life is good and I am more and more grateful every day.

Sweetie.

Those of you who know me know that I raised girls...two beautiful, sweet girls.  So, I don't have first hand knowledge of raising boys.  I know it's different.  More physical.  And probably dirtier.  :)

I see this little guy a few times a year (call me for information on a "watching them grow" package) and I can tell you, he is a real sweetheart!  He is getting more and more independent and talking up a storm...it's so fun to see!  And wow, what a charmer with those big brown eyes! 

Thanks Tor & Tiden for a fun evening!

Fun little guy!

Enjoyed a warm evening with this little guy and his beautiful mom...  Typical little boy, I suppose; he was eagerly distracted by cows in the field, and playing in puddles, and the opportunity to jump off a platform into mom's arms, again and again...giggling his contagious laugh the whole time.  He also had a contemplative side, as this picture suggests...what a sweetheart! 

More pictures to come, this is just a teaser...!

Faces.

I love these faces.  They make me happy.  And sad.  All at once.

I am planning to host a gallery of Images from Burma this Fall at the Art Walk...stay tuned!

Storms.

I had a restless night last night, listening to the winds howl and the rain collide against the bedroom windows. I keep checking the calendar, to see if it really is almost June...and yet there is snow in the forecast? Yikes!

And then I began thinking about the days and nights we spent with the Karen people. We were fortunate to be there in very mild weather. No rain. No winds. It was warm and mostly sunny, and our only concern was overheating a little bit on our short walks through the jungle. Even the nights were lovely. Cool, but calm and relatively quiet.

That isn't how it always is there for the people trying to live their lives there. They, too, have to deal with nights like last night, where the winds are whipping and the rains are beating down...only they do it in their modest huts, on their dirt hillsides... And I am certain they do it with the same admirable grace and humility that they manage in their everyday lives.



We brought a few little gifts along on our trip, mostly for the children; books and crayons, dolls and small toys…and we spent most of a day sitting with these two young girls, sisters, in their family's home. They sat quietly with us, all day, drawing pictures, getting their nails painted, and playing with a few little toys, all the while listening to all the talk around them about the enemy that threatens their very existence. How do those girls sleep at night? I stayed up last night, worried that my new planter wasn't going to survive the storm…and then worrying that these beautiful young girls won't survive the storm that surrounds them…

I am going to update our website soon, I promise…and I am going to include a gallery of images from our trip with Partners. All proceeds from any print orders in that gallery will go toward their goal of "free, full lives for the children of Burma."

This is the face I see in my dreams....

A few of the Karen children we met along the way...

I feel as if I have this burden and I don't really know what to do about it, or how to deal with it...not just yet anyway.  My burden is this...that I want you, because you are reading this, to care about these children as much as I have learned to care about them.  I want you to worry with me; about their health, their education, their families and their future.  I want you to see them as your own children, or grand-children, or nieces and nephews, and see that they deserve so much more than what they currently endure.  I want you to empathize with the life they are living; in such poverty it is almost unimaginable to those of us with full bellies and full closets, with the freedom to go to school and to go to the store and to sleep peacefully every night. 

And yet, I am without adequate words to explain to you what it was like to meet these children; to hear them sing and laugh, and to hear them speak in a language I didn't understand but yet could easily comprehend with their smiles and giggles.

It was heart-warming and heart-wrenching all in the same breath.

These are a few of the Karen children we met, living in refugee camps and hide sites along the Salween River...